If you speak they arrest you. And if you don’t speak, they arrest you for ironic insubordination.
–George Steiner recounting advice given to Boris Pasternak at the 1937 Soviet Writers Conference in Moscow during the Stalin purges
In 1990 I was in weekly psychotherapy with a psychoanalyst. He said that I had s significant psychological investment in my mother. Exasperated I said: “But I don’t even talk about my mother!” He replied: “You’re protecting your mother.”
If you talk about your mother you are fixated on your mother. And if you don’t talk about your mother, you are fixated on your mother.